Wednesday, July 31, 2024

I’m pushing this post so that you have it before school starts!

Your attitude matters. Try really hard to not speak negatively of the school or any teachers.

Even the most surly teen probably wants to make a new beginning special. Ask if they want to buy a few supplies and get ice cream. I bet they do!

Back to school is extremely expensive, but I think a few new things really helps. Maybe ask questions like, “what do you think you’ll want to wear this year?”, “was there anything you wore last year that you still want to wear or anything you definitely didn’t like or feel comfortable in?” and maybe don’t go too crazy because they may want to see how others are dressing. Also, sometimes grandparents just need a push or a suggestion. You could ask if they want to take them for their new shoes or something. They might be happy to contribute to back to school!

If your kid is walking, biking, driving for the first time to their school, practice the route before school starts – preferably at the time they would go. If it’s a new driver, sit in the passenger seat and the reward can be donuts. They will make fun of you, but it’s important. Just say that this is better than you riding with them on day one when everyone will see you in the car! Have them literally practice parking in the spot they will use.

I see many parents trying to be their kids’ friends. They need you to parent. Don’t be afraid to say “no”. Seriously. I don’t get it. In our family, we said, “we don’t agree with that” or “we don’t do that” when the kids talked about what a friend could do.

If the school offers an open house or a day to pick up schedules and “walk the schedule” make every effort to go. This really helps with new year jitters. Do not be offended if your kid is older and wants to meet friends to do this. Maybe you can compromise and drive separately and you pay the fees then let them do the rest with friends.

Ask open ended questions like, “what is the class you are most excited to take?” and really try to listen more than you talk. Try not to compare an older sibling’s experience or your own experience. It’s ok to tell funny stories but try not to preach. Get them talking if you can. Be really slow to respond and just let them talk. Teens shut down very easily. All of this is normal. Try not to say things like “that’s stupid!” because to them it isn’t stupid.

For the love of all things, please read the emails or the communications the school sends. If you feel disconnected, it might be on you. I know this is overwhelming. And, if you have multiple kids in multiple schools – whew! Put husband on one or more of the schools or kids. You don’t need to do it all.

It’s ok to write down or snap a picture of your kid’s schedule. Sometimes it’s important to know when they have which class when it comes to making appointments. Yes, some appointments have to be done during school time, but avoid when possible. Also, print out the school year calendar. There are so many days when school is out. I sometimes have a student say they aren’t passing a class and then they laugh and say they HAVE MISSED that class multiple times. Ummm… there is a correlation.

If your kid is middle school or older or maybe even late elementary have them start emailing the teacher instead of you. Maybe there is a health condition you want to make sure the teacher knows about so that might need to come from you. It’s so important to start putting this stuff on the kid so that they are capable by the time they need to be. I have had kids email me before school starts to tell me they prefer a different name than what is on my roster. I never get upset by these emails; I respect and appreciate them being on the ball. Also, don’t assume that just because you told the counselor that the information got to all 7 teachers. Yes, they should be sharing it, but they also have a lot of kids on their plate.

Attendance is so important and that starts with you. Do not act like attendance is a choice. Do not plan vacations during school days. It really hurts your kid. Can you imagine trying to make up even a day’s worth of assignments. That could be 7 things from missing one day on top of a new 7 things assigned. This goes back to printing off that school calendar.

Don’t “rescue” your kid. If they forget lunch, that’s not an emergency. If they forget a paper, they can bring it the next day. The person at the school desk is not running a concierge service. We have even had kids forget their headphones and a parent brings them. Nope. If I were principal, I would have a strict policy about this, but we can’t offend anyone anymore and we walk on eggshells.

Do try to get them to keep a granola bar or something that can be quickly eaten in their backpack. You never know when that might come in handy.

Please talk to kids about cellphones. Many schools are afraid to have strict policies these days – again eggshells. If you can avoid texting during the school day, please do. If they text you, don’t respond unless it’s an emergency. Tough love. They should not be on their phones during class. I know someone whose daughter was constantly texting “come get me” and guess what – mom came and got and the kid learned they can pull this and do. I actually think it’s great when parents are not available. Does everyone work from home these days? I see parents picking up kids in droves these days. Seriously? Whatever happened to coming at the start of the day and staying until the end of the day. I make a big deal about good attendance in my classes.

I know I’ve forgotten some things! Whew!

Lest you think I’m a hypocrite…my children (twins) only missed 3 days of school from kindergarten until senior year. Two were funerals and one was a sick day each at different times. This was a combination of luck, good health, and Tom and I not really giving them an option to not go to school. Also, as a teacher, I couldn’t really plan vacations during the school year, either. They always really loved school, too. The more you go consistently the easier it is. The more you miss, the more you want to miss.

Sound off in the comments!

Amy

Monday, July 29, 2024

It’s Monday and time to link up with Sarah and Holly to tell about our weekends…

How was yours?

Let’s start with Thursday night.

Tom knows the guy that wrote this book (booklet?). It was very short and very, very bad. He was invited to the book signing party at a big event space.

It was super weird but entertaining. But, when we got to Tom’s car (we were only there from 6:00-7:30 – broad daylight), I immediately knew something was off. Tom had basically everything stolen from his car. He had boat radios, boat stereo (we take it out when not on the boat), chargers, sunglasses, and so much more. I’ve always joked with Tom about how much crap he keeps in his car. I had my wallet (I had taken out the credit cards and my license) and my prescription sunglasses stolen. We were both so upset and called the police and made a report. We wished we hadn’t gone to the event. And, it seemed like Tom forgot to lock his car. Oops, Tom. There was no sign of forced entry.

Friday morning I woke up and my oven told me it was Olympics time! Ha! This oven! It changed to different sports and different scenes all weekend. I’m kind of freaked out if you must know. Does my oven need to be this smart?

Friday I picked up my sourdough and bagel order from my former student and I left some goodies for her kids on her porch. She sent me the cutest video of them opening their goodie bags.

We had to take Eddie Otis to get weighed for his next flea and tick dosage and he weighs 46 pounds! Here is a photo that shows the length of him now:

I actually decided to watch the opening ceremonies live and had it on all day. The boats on the Seine cracked me up. I thought it was funny when a small country had a small boat. I wonder how many of the athletes got motion sickness?

I mean, come on – you knew I would be wearing the Paris slides!

I made a French dinner and Mason’s college roommate came for dinner and they went to a movie. Mason had so much fun catching up.

Saturday I made a mess of breakfast sandwiches for anyone that wanted one.

This weekend I finished two books.

I think this was my favorite of the summer so far:

I also really enjoyed this:

Look at the beautiful inside cover:

This mani is going strong a week later and I really love the color.

I started this:

It’s probably for a much younger audience and it’s about ice hockey, so I’m not sure yet…

I am trying to get back on my iced protein coffee and this hit the spot! I like Premier vanilla or cake batter the best with some instant coffee grounds and water all frothed up.

Saturday afternoon, Tom, EO, and I went out on the boat.

Saturday evening Tom and I went to an outdoor concert with food trucks for dinner.

Sunday morning I rose and watched some Olympics! My bestie’s daughter does eventing and she knew an Olympian so I wanted to watch!

Along with his 46 pound weight, EO has had some neck growth, so we changed out his collar to his big brother’s old one. I think the green really brings out his beautiful eyes.

Can you see the tiny stick he has?

EO seems to have a pretty good vocabulary now. He can go get specific toys. He knows the words “sit, hungry, treat, water, tug (his tug toy), ball, stick, duck (his duck toy), lambie (his lamb toy), and margarita (his margarita toy)! He does not know the words, “come” and “no”. So, it’s a work in progress.

As you are reading this, I am preparing for a two day professional development today and tomorrow. I don’t have to do this, but it will knock out all of my hours for the year. I like to think of my “future self” with stuff like this. I will be glad to get it knocked out and it won’t take up mental space. I had to piece meal my hours last year and it was stressful – an hour here, two hours here, etc.

Oh well. I hope it isn’t the worst one I’ve ever done! Ha!

Amy

Friday, July 26, 2024

Well, this is a Friday I have not been wanting to see. I am almost full time as of Monday. I have a two day workshop and one day to set up my room and the other two days are appointments and I’m sure last minute errands. Teachers start August 5th and have three work days and the kids come August 8th. So.freaking.early.

Teachers can love their jobs, but starting a school year is like getting on a roller coaster that you know nothing about!

I am happy to link up with Andrea and Erika for some favorites of the week!

Here we go…

My first favorite is how well my mom is doing! Hello Monday will tell you a little more if you have been gone from the blog world. I am really behind on responding to comments, but please know how much I appreciate you leaving them!

Also, Eating Lately was my post on Tuesday if you missed it.

This and That was just a fun chatty post on Wednesday.

Fashion Files was Thursday but there ain’t much fashion in my files lately.

I am really enjoying my new Nespresso! But, wow are the capsules expensive. I bought some on Amazon that are about $1 a cup of coffee and some at Kroger (Starbucks brand) that come to about $1.30 a cup. I guess it’s a savings if you are a regular drive thru coffee gal, but otherwise.. heck no. I knew this was a luxury purchase. I am still figuring out if I will make a pot (the most cost effective) and save this for weekends or afternoon? I love the nice frothy foam that you get.

By the way, I got the Vertuo Pop and I clicked on used and the one I got came fully packaged so it was not used.

I came home from my mom’s on Sunday and just felt emotionally, physically and mentally drained after a week of uncertainty and more information than I thought my brain could hold. I really wasted my Sunday afternoon to be honest. Mason was with some friends all day but came home and said he wanted to do a coffee shop with me the next morning – I think he wanted to cheer me up and I also didn’t know what the week held so there was a sense of urgency to do some more summer things.

We tried a coffee shop in the ground floor of a building of 6 apartments. It’s called Hotel Marty and was so cute.

It had a cool interior and a huge exterior space. We both loved our drinks – iced coffee for me and tea for Mason. We split a blueberry scone.

My kids made jambalaya for our dinner one night this week!

I made the Dolly Parton cornbread! Yum!

What can’t Dolly do? Wasn’t she great on the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader doc?

I purchased a new spirit – St. Germain is an elderflower liqueur and it’s really good!

Two cocktail “recipes” are coming next week!

Oh, funny story… I walked in the liquor store and pronounced this in French to ask if they carried it and the guy didn’t understand “my French”. I guess I said it like, “San Ger mahhhn”. Isn’t that correct? Ha!

My student is doing a bagel pop up again but this time she is also selling sourdough! Guess who placed an order?

Jen made me aware of this IG account! This is me:

I felt so seen!

Eddie Otis and I have a walk every morning and we saw the buses practicing! Remember how we started school last year on August 9th and then didn’t go back until August 21st because of our bus fiasco?

EO and I saw football practice at my school, band camp at my school, and three of my students came over and said “hi” to EO!

EO waiting for Mason to wake up:

EO knew it was Taco Tuesday on Tuesday. He seriously had ignored this taco dog toy for quite some time and then brought this to me this Tuesday! It made me laugh so hard! My child is gifted, no?

If I have time, this is a favorite breakfast right now. I have three Amylu chicken breakfast sausages from Costco (still love this after a long, long time!), scrambled egg, and little potatoes.

Another dinner we had this week was turkey burgers in a lettuce ‘bun”, asparagus, and homemade potato wedges.

Are you going to go to the theater to see It Ends with Us? I think I will buy advance tickets. Why not? I need to refresh my memory on what happened in the Colleen Hoover book. I really like Blake Lively.

This week I also tackled some basement storage junk – decorative pillows I don’t like anymore, decor, stuff like that. I donated two giant trash bags. I had some reading time, too. I am actually reading two really good books! One was somewhere else so I grabbed the next one to start. Now I can’t put that one down! We had really nice temps for sitting outside except for the gosh darn mosquitoes! I spray bug spray on myself and still get bites. We have our yard sprayed and have a little contraption to keep them at bay, too. I just think it must be a really bad year for them with all the rain we have had.

Anyway, I have had a good week mainly because my mom is doing so well!

I hope you had lots of favorites, too!

Amy

Thursday, July 25, 2024

Today is Thursday and that means Fashion Files day with Kellyann and Jill.

First, let’s talk summer clothing shopping!

Have you been buying summer clothes that are on sale? I really have not been in many stores nor have I been online much. I feel like there are so few days that I actually put on an outfit lately that I have plenty! That’s a good feeling to have.

Are you tired of your summer clothing? I am not really tired of mine, but I guess I have several things on repeat. I do have to go to a faculty retreat next week so I will wear something a little more put together but still summer casual. Most teachers still wear shorts or something very casual to these things.

I did not keep the black set from Amazon. I ordered a $20 cropped pant and top set. The top was too small and had no give/stretch and the pants were a bit big. Maybe I will have to “make my own set”. The idea of the set really appeals to me, but it will have to be perfect.

I have hardly gone in any stores this summer like I said. I have been to my consignment shops once, TJ Maxx maybe twice, and a few little boutiques in the upscale shopping center near my house. I walked in Loft once but I feel like I need a break from Loft. So many teachers shop there and I don’t want to have the same stuff as everyone else. I also walked in J.Crew Factory once or twice because it’s next to Trader Joe’s, but I didn’t buy anything. Old Navy and Walmart have been my primary retailer this summer. I have gotten graphic tees, three pairs of linen shorts, and dresses. I don’t want this to be the case, but I have found things I like at these two retailers! Now, I will say that I really only buy Free Assembly from Walmart. I filter for that brand and I feel that the quality rivals the stuff in my little boutiques. I love the boutique brand Umgee. My sister found a boutique in the home town with Umgee stuff.

My sister and I went into TJ Maxx when we were there helping my mom. It was a big deal for her town to get a TJ Maxx! Did I need anything? No! But, I did find a couple of tops that I think will be handy when I start “getting dressed” more.

I loved the blue and white and I like this style of top:

I think a chambray button up is really handy and this can serve like that. I really like this tone with black. I also think it will work with some of my printed bottoms.

The tops were $16.99 and $19.99 so nothing crazy. You can find some really nice blouses at TJ Maxx.

These were on clearance for $13 and I thought they were fun. I don’t have much navy in my wardrobe, but I think I can find some things they will work with.

What’s up with me and the color blue?

I plan to wear dresses and my printed pants and skirts when school starts. I also plan to wear sneakers a lot. How does one look cool and not dowdy? I’m not sure that is possible for me but I also am not sure that I care! Any suggestions on cool girl sneakers with dresses? I have some ideas but I want to hear what you all say.

I do feel a push to wear/buy more neutrals. I am going to think on that some more.

Amy

Wednesday, July 24, 2024

Today I have a random post for you!

Let’s talk about Prime Days, first…

First off, I am getting better at returning things that aren’t perfect. In the past I would “make do” or say “it’s only $___”.

I returned the Amazon set – not sure a set will work for me because I need a larger top size. I also returned the sunglasses that go over the glasses.

I did, however, keep the Nespresso and I am still learning how to enjoy it. So far, so good!

Productivity…

I am going to wrap up my 40 Bags/40 Days (it was never really 40 bags and I did it quicker than 40 days, but whatever) soon. I am following some decluttering people on IG and it’s so inspiring. I only want to have things I love and use. It’s making keeping things clean so much easier to have less stuff and that’s my goal.

I honestly don’t think I have ever shopped so little in the summer. I have always shopped for recreation and this summer the decluttering has kept me from it and even left a bad taste in my mouth about adding more instead of subtracting.

I still did a fair amount of shopping, though. Don’t feel too badly for me!

Just below this list I printed off blank calendars for May, June, July, and August. I still have my beloved planner that I carry around, but I also liked having these calendars. I think I will print them for the fall months, too.

Summer Reading…

I read this book this summer – or most of it. I think I gave up at about 75% in, but it made me laugh so hard because…

Someone had crossed out every single “GD” word in the book. They left all the F words and salacious sex scenes alone, but this word got crossed out angrily with a blue ballpoint pen.

Social Media…

For social media, I have Facebook and Instagram. I got Instagram a long time ago (before most people in my peer group) just to use with my students, but now I guess it’s a mixture of friends and students. Students were early adopters of IG and most people my age were only on Facebook at the time.

I tell them they can follow me but I don’t approach them. I do follow back. That is why if you follow me at amscott2 you will see a lot of Spanish stuff and I try to not show alcohol there. I couldn’t keep up with a separate Coffee and Cocktails account.

I love Instagram. I think it has helped me understand my students better and grow closer to them. I keep up with so many former students this way, too. Current students (I often teach kids two years in a row) can message me or say hi, too. Anyway, I am very careful, but it’s been fun.

In the last few years, I have lots of students who freely say “Te quiero” (I love you) in notes to me or in passing. I think it’s super sweet. I have one girl who put a question box and I just said this to her. Look at her sweet reply:

I am definitely not the “best teacher ever” and her class was really hard because it was first period and I seriously had kids arriving anywhere from one minute to thirty minutes late (in a fifty minute period) because of our bus fiasco, so it made it so hard to do class activities and I had to constantly repeat myself. Anyway, teenagers are really sweet and compassionate. But, also, their brains are not fully developed and they do dumb things. Both of my sisters had one of their daughters do a dumb thing this week in the midst of my mom’s situation and I reminded them that they are still good kids.

Eddie Otis has changed so much this summer. I don’t know what he weighs now but it’s probably about 50 pounds. He was wanting to be carried down the steps at the beginning of the summer and now he is an independent boy. He now gets down from the bed (maybe not a good thing!) and he goes down the basement stairs on his own when we don’t have the baby gate up. I hate having baby gates, but it’s a season.

He loves carrying his toys around to show us:

He went downstairs and has the tv remote in his mouth in this photo. I told Tom he was tired of watching the Tour de France with him.

When we walk, he wants to meet every dog we see and I always ask the owner but they always say he can meet them. Then, we approach and he sniffs the dog but then he wants the human attention. He basically gets as close to them as possible for belly rubs and pets. He acts like he doesn’t get any of that from us! He is super social!

He is a really good swimmer – he’s a lab! Tom takes him swimming at least once a week. It gives me a chance to have the house without a puppy to clean but I really need to go with them to enjoy watching him, too. I cannot sweep, mop, or vacuum with him inside. He attacks or thinks it’s a toy. I can’t unload the dishwasher or open the washer (front loader) or dryer (front loader) because he enjoys “helping”.

And, Tom has taught him to go down all the playground slides behind our house.

He is still bitey sometimes, but it’s definitely better. He is 5 months old today, in fact! He was born February 24th!

That was a whole bunch of randomness, but I hope you enjoyed it.

What would you tell me today?

Amy

Tuesday, July 23, 2024

Are you in a cooking rut? Eating rut? Are you almost but not quite ready for fall food? I’m there with you! I always enjoy these posts when other people do them, so here we go. I’m going to show you a mix of home food, restaurant food, and even some hospital food – ha! But, the main point is ideas!

Tom and I made a Costco trip and he wanted some “burnt ends”. I guess this is a form of bbq and you had to heat it in the oven or the skillet and we added Baby Ray’s bbq sauce. We also had Dave’s spicy pickles from Costco and a simple baked potato. I was out of sour cream.

We also had salad with our new favorite store bought dressing – Chick Fil A apple cider vinegar. It’s in the refrigerated dressing section.

I brought these Trader Joe’s egg sandwiches for my sister when we stayed with my mom and we had some cherries. I really liked the egg sandwich.

I brought Greek bowls for dinner:

Deconstructed nachos that you could easily do yourself:

Hospital baked potato bar with carrots and broccoli – the vegetables were gross and fresh is always better:

Hospital baked fish:

Zucchini, grape tomatoes, pasta – I just made this up myself. I added some pasta water to the sauce mixture:

Restaurant salmon, asparagus, and grits. Mason couldn’t believe how good this asparagus was. I plan to make my own salmon and asparagus soon.

We’ve been enjoying yogurt like this lately:

My favorite and really only cottage cheese I can stomach on its own:

This easy little lunch is packed full of flavor. You can add peanuts or sesame seeds but you don’t need it in my opinion:

Veggie sandwiches:

And, this little bad boy. If you have been thinking about getting a “snackle box” – do it. I have used it more for salad bar fixings and our family has never eaten more salads. I just keep the whole thing in the fridge. I’ve used it for the boat, I’ve used it for taco fixings, and it’s a great practice to keep chopped up stuff ready because some nights chopping all the stuff for salad seems like too much.

I hope you got at least one idea!

What have you been eating lately?

Amy

Monday, July 22, 2024

Well, I have to start by saying thank you so much for all your supportive words on Friday’s post and there is a lot of wisdom in the comments sections if you want to go back and read. For some reason, it’s not letting me link back, but it is the post right after this one.

Basically, my mom went to the ER Sunday night and was seriously low on hemoglobin. Sunday through Thursday were a whirlwind!

So, I left off on Thursday morning around 7:00 a.m. before I drove to the hospital. It is an hour from my house, by the way. Both of my kids came with me and we arrived just after my Columbus, Ohio sister left the hospital to head home. She had arrived Monday around noon and stayed until Thursday morning. She’s a trooper. We had come up with a schedule – Kate: Wednesday, Amy: Thursday, and Molly: Friday so at this point we were following our schedule.

My goals for the day were to see if my mom would get seen by a PT person and to personally speak to the hospitalist. This is a rather new term for me but apparently it is the doctor that oversees the big picture of the patient’s care and is the one who determines when they go home, too, maybe?

The kids and I said hi to my mom and she looked better than she had looked since Monday. We were going to sit down and visit, but different people started coming in to do different things so I sent the kids to go eat in the cafeteria but I stayed with her.

My mom’s garage door has been a problem for awhile and her friend kept telling us about it so I called a company and they could come look at it between 12-4. So, that became the job of my kids – to be at Grandma’s house when they came and facilitate that. Guess when they came? Yes, you guessed it – as close to 4:00 as possible! So, those two waited around at the house for 4 hours and actually served a big purpose! We are getting an estimate to help my mom get it fixed.

I stayed at the hospital and way earlier than expected got to see the phyiscal therapist, listen to the questions she asked, and then see the tests she put mom through. She asked her to try a walker and I thought that was going to be a deal breaker, but she used it.

To my utter shock, the PT said that she was ready to go home from a PT stand point. She explained that she doesn’t make the call but that she is strong enough.

Then, right after that, comes the hospitalist and he says she is ready to go home. This was around 1:00 and he talked to us for a long time and said it would be a few hours before she would actually get to “check out”.

I was shocked. Sisters were shocked. We were not prepared for her to be at home. Not only would she be going home, but she would be going home with a walker (that she agreed to) and some furniture adjustments would have to be made – but my mom can live all on one level. She has two bathrooms, kitchen, primary bedroom, living room, laundry room, and dining room all on the main level. Of course, she was ready to go home!

My kids had only planned on it being a day visit, but they were so wonderful. We went to Walmart to get some things to spend the night while mom was still in the hospital (left one kid for the garage door people – I was regretting that being on our plate then!) and came back and moved throw rugs, some furniture, etc.

We got her home and settled around 5:00. It was nice to have three of us to watch her with the walker, make sure she was comfortable, bring her things, write notes, record medicine times, and things like that.

Friday morning Molly arrived around 10:00 and she and I went to the store together and my kids did Grandma duty. Mom is doing everything on her own but we were not ready to leave her alone. The kids and I left and unfortunately Molly had none of her kids with her, but she assured us she was fine.

Molly took my mom to a hair appointment because this was the top priority for my mom – probably a good sign, right?

Thursday in my hometown was simply gorgeous and Friday was the same:

I was thankful someone left me a Michelob Ultra Light.

I would’ve loved to enjoy it with my Dad. This is where he always sat to wait for us.

We got home Friday around 1:00 and I found that Eddie Otis had played with/eaten a potato. Yup, a raw potato!

Molly made me promise to do something fun so I called my captain:

And, my first mate.

It was lovely. We went to Captain’s Quarters and I got a Hugo Spritz and Tom got an Arnold Palmer.

This might be my new drink for the rest of summer:

We took our food to go and it was so smart – deconstructed pork nachos meant that we could fix them how we wanted to at home.

Saturday I slept in later than I have all summer.

I piddled and did a couple of errands and then I went back to help Molly. The difference in my mom was crazy! She was moving so much faster, had much more appetite, looked better, and more. She went to get the mail on her own. Molly was the perfect person to get her to that stage.

We sat on the porch and toasted our Dad with some charcuterie while Mom napped.

I brought Greek bowls for dinner and an old favorite for my mom of just macaroni noodles and tomato sauce. I also had some zucchini for her.

We got mom out in the car to run a couple of errands and then my mom said she was fine for us to go to TJ Maxx and look what I got – my $13 Olympics watching sandals! Ha!

We got up Sunday and did an errand for mom and got a Scooter’s iced coffee.

And, I did my press ons while sitting on mom’s patio. Her teal table looks good with my color!

I came back home and was so tired. I napped a bit inside and then I went outside to read my book and fell asleep there, too.

I’m really enjoying this so far!

I don’t know how often I will show up here this week – we will see what the week holds.

Again, I thank you so much for your comments! You all are the best!

Amy

Friday, July 19, 2024

I’m sitting here on my covered patio with some light rain going and it feels like a gift. It’s Wednesday morning (7:00 am) and I feel like I’ve already lived many lives this week.

I decided to write about this to help anyone else and because a lot of us in the blog world are experiencing this stage of life – aging parents.

And, if this isn’t your thing, that’s ok, too!

My mom in June with her three daughters:

My mom is super strong and independent. She suffered a stroke last June and fully recovered with no rehab or therapies needed. It was pretty amazing. She is 81 and lives alone since my dad passed. None of us live in the same town, nor does she have other family there. So, that’s really hard.

Last week she started saying that she felt weak and had no appetite. She went to the doctor on Wednesday and he said she was dehydrated. She did a few things the rest of the week, but still didn’t feel that great. Over the weekend, she continued to feel weak. My two sisters and I were available to go see her or take her back to the doctor, but she refused the offers. Sunday night at 10 pm she finally agreed to let her friend take her to the ER. She is really lucky to have a really good friend who she has traveled with and who also sadly shares the widow status with her. In fact, their husbands died within 3 weeks of each other.

So, her friend kept us updated from 10pm until almost 3 am Sunday night into Monday. They finally saw my mom, admitted her, and then started giving her blood as they determined that her hemoglobin was down to 4.6 and it’s supposed to be 11-12.

I had already told my sisters that I would head there in the morning on Monday. So, I was going for sure. We learned with my Dad in the hospital for 7 weeks, and then my mom’s stroke that we have to take turns and be smart about creating a shift schedule I guess you could say. So, I was going to take shift number one and see what we were dealing with.

Her friend started texting us again around 7 am (she had already gotten back to the hospital just 4 hours after going home! Good friend!) and told us mom was getting more blood and doing well. I told her I was on my way and would be there a bit after 8 am.

Well, as I was driving, the friend started texting us that we all needed to come and that my mom’s BP, body temp, etc. were all very low and there were many health professionals running to her room.

So, my two sisters both started getting stuff together to come, too. We talked on the phone through tears and just talked about being on the same page, my mom’s wishes, and things like that.

I got there and my mom had gotten stabilized but had been moved to ICU. I thanked the friend and she left. I started taking notes on everything that the friend had told me, then a nurse and doctor came out to talk to me and even though she was stabilized at that point, the doctor made it clear how serious it was. The nurse asked me about wishes for “full code” which means to do anything necessary to keep her alive. So, this was serious.

I got to go back and see my mom and she looked really bad. She knew who I was and was talking but I couldn’t understand her very well.

One sister arrived and I met her at the elevator and I filled her in before we went back to see my mom. Her body temp had been 95 and they were using a warming blanket to bring it up. Her blood pressure had been really low and it was coming up with dopamine. They were going to do an endoscopy to find out if she had an internal bleed and they were going to do a colonoscopy but needed to wait “a few days” until she was stronger.

The second sister arrived and we filled her in, too. She had all her kids but we told her to keep them at mom’s house for now because of how much equipment was in the room and how bad she looked. Mom was talking and knew who all of us were but she was pretty out of it and sleepy from all the drugs. The endoscopy was done and we found out it was clear. All three of us got to talk to the doctor.

Nothing happens (or not as much) on the weekends in hospitals so we were all thankful it was a Monday!

At some point, Molly and I stepped out to find the power of attorney paperwork in case it was needed. Molly is the only one living in the same state as my mom, so it was easiest to make her the POA. We dropped it off with her financial advisor in case we needed to start talking about the business side of things -what money is set aside for mom’s care. It may seem in poor taste to mention this, but please make sure you have this is place for your parents.

As the day went on she kept improving! Her body temp was normal, her BP was normal, her talking was normal and she was acting like herself. Then, we got the news that her hemoglobin was back to normal – at 12!

So, something like this is not only physically exhausting but also mentally and emotionally exhausting.

The three of us talked about how we all have our strengths – I am the oldest, type A, ask lots of questions, take copious notes. Molly, the baby, is probably the best caretaker type, and Kate the middle is very smart, does the research, and is really flexible and able to do whatever is needed in a crisis. She is so strong and such a rock and has been through a lot so is really good with stuff like this.

Kate’s three kids got to come over and visit for a while.

To go from thinking we are saying good bye at 7 a.m. to such good news by late afternoon was pretty crazy and a testament to how strong our mom is!

So, Kate had three kids and a dog with her and was staying at my mom’s house because she lives over 3 hours away. Molly was also staying at my mom’s house because she lives 2 hours away. I decided to go on home because it was my anniversary – lol. And, now it seemed weird that Tom’s Montana trip got cancelled because of the timing of everything with my mom, right? I’m still sad he couldn’t go, but it was nice to have him here as my rock.

Tom and I met at a Mexican restaurant when I got back to town and I showered and crashed, but couldn’t sleep. There were so many unknowns and I honestly think the oldest child feels responsible and that was me.

Sunday night I probably got two hours of sleep, Monday night I probably got four hours of sleep, and then finally last night I slept great!

So, back to the story…

Another thing I always do is call the night shift nurse to get a report before they switch to day. I found out that mom had bleed significantly (remember that we were looking for the reason the hemoglobin got so low) and they were going ahead with a colonoscopy. Maybe this was actually good because before they were going to wait a few days.

Kate and Molly got back to the hospital after I told them this and started sending me reports that she was getting prepped.

Tuesday morning Tom drove me back. It was really nice to have him drive since I was so tired. I also didn’t know what the day held. We were lucky to have the kids on hand to handle the puppy all day, too.

Tom dropped me off and went and ran a few errands – checked on my mom’s house, her garage door opener was broken, got gas, stuff like that.

The hospital had a German food truck already parked out front so I told Tom it was his reward! Tom loves German food and was born in Germany.

So, I was at the hospital at 9:00 ish and met my sisters in the colonoscopy waiting room (that’s not really what it was called) and I was ready to take over. They wanted me to remind the staff that we were there if the doctor wanted to talk to us. They like me to handle the communications issues and I have no trouble talking (or writing – as you can see – if there is anyone still out there – ha!).

So, we didn’t have to wait long and a nurse came out and told us that they found her issue and it all has to do with the blood thinner she is one because of the stroke. She had something called ischemic colitis and it’s a very easy fix with an antibiotic which they had already started in her IV.

What? We were just dumbfounded. So we had gone from thinking this was it Monday morning to Tuesday morning being told she just needed an antibiotic.

The rest of the day we didn’t get to talk to anyone else – missed the doc doing the rounds while the nurse was talking to us in the waiting room – boo and mom was sedated and sleepy until dinner time. We kept going in and out but mainly stayed in the waiting room.

Molly’s hub arrived with 3/4 of her kids so that was nice. Then, Molly’s hub and Tom went and did some “guy stuff” so that was good for them. I think they shopped and looked at ATVS. Yes, we also ate German food in the waiting room. Sorry to anyone for the smell of sauerkraut. Also, the elevator still smells like sauerkraut.

A case manager came to get information from us for future discharge just to get some things on file. She also gave us lots of resources for maybe not now but in the future. That was really helpful.

Tom and I stayed until 6:00, I think. Molly went home around 7:00 with her hub and kids (in 2 cars).

Kate is doing today (Wednesday) and then I go back tomorrow (Thursday).

Molly is doing Friday.

We just don’t know how long she will be in the hospital and we learned the lesson that as much as we like it to be all three of us, that we have to manage our resources.

If your loved one is on a blood thinner and gets very weak, this is extremely common.

So, now it’s Thursday morning as I finish this post…

So, Wednesday on Kate’s shift, she got to talk to the doctor. He said that even though we have figured out the immediate problem, that she is still very sick and this has to be happening (losing blood – not producing enough blood) for some reason that will be figured out in an out patient setting. So, we were also kind of shocked about this after what we thought was good news the day before. I guess we shouldn’t have been shocked, but we were.

He said she would be going back to her hematologist and her oncologist after this immediate threat is handled. She has had lymphoma before and she was having kidney issues and had already met with both of these doctors before this happened. In fact, they had thrown out a possible multiple myeloma possibility but my mom refused the biopsy to know for sure. So, even though I was home on Wednesday, Molly was home on Wednesday, and Kate was the hospital person, we talked and texted for quite a bit and were kind of reeling from this latest news.

Remember I said that my mom is very strong? Well, what comes with that is independence and stubbornness, too. After her stroke last year she refused physical therapy and she has already made some remarks about how she plans to handle the current situation. And, she is still saying she does not want the biopsy.

She definitely wants to continue to live alone in HER house, but we know that at the very least she will need some help. Kate started the conversation about her needing to do some therapies and agree to some things if that is her goal.

Any advice is appreciated! If you have also been through this, let me know. And, maybe you won’t need this for a long, long time with your parents, but I hope it will help someone.

Also, this week I finished this:

Loved it! So, I think the most recent Emily Henry and the first Emily Henry were my faves. Her others were just meh for me.

And, I started this:

I’ve been so busy it’s been hard to shop, but I managed to still participate in Prime Days!

I ordered sunglasses that go over glasses (you know you’re old when…), a “set” recommended by a few people all over the internet, and a Nespresso! The price was great and if I don’t like it I will send it back.

Our Mexican anniversary dinner:

I really need to do a Tom appreciation post. On my day back at home we went to Costco together even though I told him it was his day to pick what we did – and he just really let me rest. He did keep his days off this week since he was supposed to be in Montana. He has helped me, done house projects, and done lots of puppy time. Tom is not a grand gesture guy, but he’s pretty great to have around.

If anyone is still here, happy Friday and I hope you have a fun summer weekend!

Amy

Thursday, July 18. 2024

Well, I continue to rock the bike shorts with a graphic tee. I even bought myself another pair since I’m wearing them daily. Now, I have three pairs and they all have pockets on both sides. Here is my newest pair.

I can put my phone in one side and my Airpod case in the other. They are great for walking and for cleaning around the house. I wear them out with an opened button up shirt, too.

I’ve been reaching for my new Old Navy outfit:

I got a third pair of the linen shorts and I got a short sleeved gauzy button up.

Walmart Free Assembly dress for dinner out:

Walmart Free Assembly dress for dinner out:

This week I have had a fun press on mani:

Do you do jewelry for the pool? I like this fun stack that I have had forever:

And, I usually do wear earrings, but keep it simple and make sure it’s earrings I could easily replace:

Am I chic in the summer? Not really!

What have you been wearing lately? Are you chic? Or, are you just hot?

Amy